Even in Death
by dreamer.dancer.writer
Summary: When Dougie dies, Danny is utterly distraught. Dougie is his whole reason for being. But when he remembers a long forgotten song, can he start to feel better again? Songfic set to Even in Death by Evanescence


_**A/N YAYA SECOND ONE SHOT TODAY. I am on a baguette today :D Thank you to my awesome beta ArtemisPhantom for making this so much better than the original :D She is utter amazingness, go read her stories and show her some love :D**_

_**Yes, I realise I write far too much Dougie/Danny stuff in which Dougie dies and it's really depressing. Yes I realise this is the third fanfic I've set to an Evancescence song. Yes, I don't care.**_

_**Speaking of, this is inspired by Even in Death by Evanescence. All their songs are so fantastic for inspiring depressing fanfics, tis brilliant :D**_

_**Disclaimer: in which nothing but the plot is mine. Creys.**_

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><p><em>Give me a reason to believe that you're gone<br>I see your shadow so I know they're all wrong  
>Moonlight on the soft brown earth<br>It leads me to where you lay  
>They took you away from me but now I'm taking you home<em>

Danny lay in Dougie's bed, sobbing desperately into the younger boy's pillow. He didn't want to believe Dougie was gone. He couldn't believe it. Only this morning he'd still been with Danny. They'd woken up and it had been like every other day.

Dougie, being the younger, hyper-active one had woken up first. He'd made coffee and breakfast and taken it to Danny. He'd woken Danny with a sweet kiss and then climbed back into bed next to him. They'd eaten breakfast whilst discussing the day ahead of them.

Danny had nothing to do, as they had no Mcfly meetings or anything that day. He was simply planning to hit the gym and do some shopping. Dougie, meanwhile, had a busy day. [He was also hitting the gym, but later. Before that] he had a series of meetings with Tom about a new project they were working on.

Once they'd eaten, Dougie had given Danny another sweet, wonderful, love-filled kiss before hopping out of bed and going to shower. Once he'd showered and dressed he'd popped his head into the bedroom and said goodbye to Danny, before leaving for his first meeting. That had been the last time Danny had seen Dougie.

Danny sobbed harder into Dougie's pillow. It smelled so much like him, that unique scent of hair spray, Lynx and Dougie. Danny couldn't believe he was gone. Dougie was always such a lively person, always bouncing around, singing and playing his bass. He was always so full of ideas and cheered Danny up whenever he was down. Whenever they went on tour Dougie always provided the most entertainment. He could make anyone laugh with his jokes and quips, even their security and management. He always got away with anything he did. Dougie could wind anyone around his little finger.

And now this bright, beautiful, bubbly angel was gone. He was gone forever, and would never come back.

_I will stay here forever with you_  
><em>My love<em>  
><em>The softly spoken words you gave me<em>  
><em>Even in death our love goes on<em>

Danny's heart felt like it was broken into a million pieces, a million pieces that would never find their way back together again. Dougie was the very essence of life, and he would never grace Danny with his presence again. Danny sobbed and sobbed, feeling like it would never get better. If it was possible, now Dougie had gone, Danny's love for the boy had grown and grown. Danny kept thinking of all the stupid, loving, wonderful things the boy had done over the years and it just made Danny miss him even more. Never again would Danny be woken up by a sweet, chaste kiss on the lips. Never again would he be able to lie in bed with the one he loved, just talking and talking. Never again would he be able to take summer's day walk through the woods with Dougie, just enjoying being alive. Never again would they be able to lie on top of their favourite hill in the middle of the night star-gazing. Never again would he have that kiss in the rain with the boy he loved with all his heart and soul.  
>It was killing Danny. He wanted Dougie back more than he'd ever wanted anything. Dougie was his whole life, his reason for existing, the boy who made the cruel world seem a whole lot better. And now he was gone. Life just wasn't worth living anymore. Danny never wanted to leave the bed again; it was where Dougie's presence lingered the most.<em><em>

_Some say I'm crazy for my love, oh my love  
>But no bonds can hold me from your side, oh my love<br>They don't know you can't leave me  
>They don't hear you singing to me<em>

Danny sobbed. He didn't even know he had this many tears to cry. Then again, he hadn't ever wanted to cry as much as he was. Dougie was gone. And he was never coming back.

That was the horrible, utter, terrible truth of it. Dougie was dead. He was lying in some morgue in some hospital; cold, dead, utterly lifeless. There was nothing on this earth that was Dougie anymore. That beautiful, angelic presence which could light up the darkest of rooms was gone. It was never coming back.

It was almost more than Danny could bear. But he had to. He knew deep down that Dougie wouldn't want him to stay like this forever.

But right now, while the pain of losing Dougie was still so fresh, so raw, Danny couldn't see any way out of the deep, black hole he'd fallen into. He sobbed more, now gazing at a picture of Dougie he'd absentmindedly picked up from his bedside table. It was a recent photo of the two of them. Danny hadn't realized Tom had taken it. They were on holiday in Spain, all taking a much needed break after their last tour. Danny was lounging on a chair and Dougie was sat on him. They were both gazing into each others eyes and there was so much love in that gaze, it was breaking Danny's heart just to look at it, to remember what they'd once had and would never have again.

As he was gazing at the picture, the lyrics of a once known, long forgotten song drifted into Danny's head and he began to sing. He sang to the picture, he sang for himself, he sang for the boy so cruelly torn from the world by that drunk driver who deserved to rot in jail.

_'I will stay here forever with you  
>My love<br>The softly spoken words you gave me  
>Even in death our love goes on<em>

_And I can't love you, anymore than I do_

_I will stay here forever with you  
>My love<br>The softly spoken words you gave me  
>Even in death our love goes on<em>

_And I can't love you anymore than I do_

_People die, but real love is forever'_

As Danny sang out the last note pure and loud, he realized the truth in the lyrics. Dougie's death was painful, it was hard and it was oh so raw. But what they had was true love and that wouldn't disappear just because Dougie had died. Danny would always love him. They were meant to be together and would have been, had that drunk driver not ploughed into the side of Dougie's car. Danny would always love Dougie, but that didn't mean he couldn't move on. It would take a while, of course it would. His younger lover had died merely hours ago, no one was expecting him to move on yet. But when he was ready, he would. He would find someone else to love, they would carry on with the band and Danny would live his life again. But that didn't mean he would forget Dougie. He would never forget him for as long as he lived, and then one day they would be together again.

Even in death, Danny loved Dougie.

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><p><em><strong>AN SO YAH. Hope you enjoyed the product of my twisted mind!**_

_**REVIEWS ARE LOVE. LOVE MAKES DANNY HAPPY. YAYA. COOKIES.**_


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